When Pantyhose Attack


     Anna is out of this world.  Way outta this world.

    Not sure what planet the head alien in ABC’s “V” television series is from, but we have been promised that these visitors come to Earth in peace.  Or is that “in piece,” meaning they’ve come for a piece of us humans?

     These visitors bring with them a seemingly innocent desire to share with us their medical and technological superiority.
 
     But c’mon.  What’s the catch here?  What do they want from us?  After enthusiastically watching the series last season, and then the premiere of the second season at 9 p.m. EST on Tuesday, March 30, 2010, I believe I have figured it all out.
 
     I think we can all agree that the “V”s are an obviously advanced civilization.  And Anna, its beautiful, classy and elegant leader, appears to be on a one-alien mission to see that women on all planets in the universe assume such power roles. 
v-ph
     Anna knows that the only way she can accomplish her goal of having women run the world is to first win over all the men on Earth.  To do that, she has to dress for success, so she routinely wears incredibly awesome designer suits, high heels and some delicious-looking sheer nude pantyhose.  Upon beholding this absolute goddess, all men on Earth instantly pledge total loyalty to Anna. They will kill or die for her.  And rightfully so.  
 
SPOILER ALERT:  Now, with control over all men, Anna turns her attention to training women in the finer art of beauty, grace and glamour, preparing them to fulfill their destiny as rulers of the world.  After all, if the charismatic leader of such vastly superior beings wouldn’t dream of going out in public without wearing pantyhose, how could mere human women?
 
    Anna definitely has the right idea here, and I for one, salute her most ambitious goal.  Females are more highly evolved creatures and clearly should be running things.   But we’ve got to start looking the part again. 
 
     Thank you, Anna, for being the shining example of what all women could be.   So ladies, if you’ve always wanted to be an alien (or just look like one) tune in to ABC at 9 p.m. EST on Tuesday nights and start supporting the cause. 
 
     Unfortunately, at the end of the show, I read this disclaimer, which I’ve written word-for-word below.  This is very discouraging to me:
The characters and events depicted in this motion picture are fictional.  Any similarity to any actual person, living or dead, or to any actual events, firms, and institutions or other entities, is coincidental and unintentional.
 
Darn.  Somewhere, Sarah Jessica Parker must be smiling.

One thought on “When Pantyhose Attack

  • “…. Anna knows that the only way she can accomplish her goal of having women run the world is to first win over all the men on Earth. To do that, she has to dress for success, so she routinely wears incredibly awesome designer suits, high heels and deliciously sheer pantyhose. Upon beholding this goddess, all the men on Earth instantly pledge total loyalty to Anna. They will kill or die for her…”.

    Truer words were never typed, Robin. So many women today do not realize how much men enjoy seeing a well dressed woman in sheer hosiery and the art of “the tease” or a touch of eroticism seems to be lost. Hosiery accentuates the lines and profile of a nice pair of legs. Shame so many forgot this.

    Your example of SJP is a good one. As much as she and the rest of her crew had nice tanned legs, with a nod to hosiery and bit of gloss thrown in, she could’ve reeled in Mr. Big with much more ease.

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